Baby Loss
One in four people are affected by pregnancy loss, yet it is a form of bereavement often ‘brushed under the carpet’ and ignored.
“In 2002 my husband and I were told our 20 week-old daughter Lucy had a life threatening abnormality and would not have survived birth and we faced the agonising decision to end the pregnancy.
Two years on I founded Forget Me Not and in 2006 became a registered charity.
From 2005-2014 Forget Me Not raised awareness of baby loss in Cornwall and helped numerous people, offering support groups, one to one befriending appointments, accompanying families to chapel of rest, annual remembrance events, supplying handmade baby gowns, pencil illustrations of their baby, offering framed 3D clay hand and foot prints and fundraising/awareness events.
In 2014 we moved to Devon from Cornwall. Prior to leaving and starting a new chapter in life, I wanted to gift something to bereaved parents in the county. I knew from parents who had contacted me over the years, that many who had experienced an early miscarriage felt an intense grief, and the absence of a special place was extremely difficult. Others who had suffered a loss many years ago, were unable to locate the final resting place for their baby, which was extremely painful.
I designed a Memorial for the Baby Garden at Penmount Crematorium, Truro, and after a long search, I was connected with a supplier in India who created a beautiful hand crafted sculpture, manifesting my drawing and vision.
We need to be free to express our emotions, not suppress them.
I wanted to provide a special place for anyone missing a child in spirit. A place to visit ... be still ... reflect ... cry ... heal.
For whatever reason you have lost your baby, the end result is the same, we have all lost something we desperately wanted and loved.
Emotional support and clear information can make a real difference. It cannot take your pain away, but it help reassure you. There is no right or wrong way to grieve, do what is right for you and never feel too scared to seek help.
In 2020 the universe guided the right people onto my path to support me and after 20 years, my body felt safe to finally connect deep within myself and the deep grief I had carried as a Mum.
Yet again, Lucy has gifted me another huge and invaluable learning on how our body holds onto the memory of trauma, and how to approach processing and releasing it with support. I will be forever grateful for those who have supported me in the process and to Lucy for guiding me on this path.
Thank you Lucy for being the inspiration for The Forget Me Not Charity, which became a catalyst for change in Cornwall.
My memories of Forget Me Not Charity can be found on this You Tube channel.
